Retreat Reflections - Wakulla Springs

I’m not really sure how to start this blog post. I just came back from a really transformative weekend. I got to know some wonderful people, enjoy the mystery and calm of nature, and learn a lot of very important lessons. What happened? I hosted my first yoga retreat.

It’s strange for me to even begin to reflect on it because I have so many different lenses I can look at it through. I can look at it through the lens of a yoga teacher and budding entrepreneur, planning and executing her first big project. I can look at it through the lens of a performance-oriented perfectionist learning to understand her anxiety. I can look at it through the lens of a human who is fed up with how disconnected life can be and is striving to create more opportunities for true connection.

I guess I’ll just start at the beginning.

I hosted my first yoga retreat.

The idea for a yoga retreat came out of several conversations with my life coach. I had the sense I wanted to make something happen but struggled to verbalize what it was. It took me a while to drill it down.

Do you know how hard it is to make friends as an adult? I’m not talking about Facebook friends or acquaintances. I’m talking about actual friends. People you can talk to about your life, not just about the weather or the latest episode of Game of Thrones. As a transplant from the state where I grew up, it’s something I notice all the time.

Sometimes I’ve been able to make those kinds of connections in yoga classes, but more often people dash in, take a class, and dash out back to their busy lives. It’s rare that people will hang around afterward to really have a conversation with you. We’re all so busy that we don’t have time to truly bond.

Students on day 5 of an Alternative Break trip in Asheville, NC

But in my work in higher education, I’ve seen students form bonds in a few days that can last a lifetime! I’ve seen people who have never talked to each other become acquaintances and then friends, and sometimes best friends, during immersive experiences I’ll call “retreats”. My first experience with this was as a student myself, attending a training retreat for my job as an Orientation Leader. After a short weekend, I felt completely comfortable and accepted in this group of people I hadn’t known on Friday.

As a professional in higher education, I’ve had the opportunity to see this in action again and again, most recently in an alternative break I chaperoned to Asheville, NC. This one was really powerful because it was organized by students. To me, it seemed like there was no real plan, no real strategy to help everyone become friends. But by the 2nd day of the trip, everyone knew and felt comfortable around everyone. It seemed like the magic came just from spending time together.

This is what I wanted to start doing. I wanted to start creating spaces for people to spend time together and start to let this connection magic happen. I was pretty sure you could do it with any activity, but the only thing really fun I was confident in doing was teaching yoga. So there you go. A yoga retreat.

I can happily say that, after all my anxiety, stress, and unforeseeable setbacks (the retreat originally scheduled for October was canceled because hurricane Michael hit us just two days before it would have taken place), the retreat was more than I could have imagined.

The magic came through. People who started the retreat having never met each other ended the first night by sharing stories of real life, real loss, real joy, and got to know each other on a much deeper level than I anticipated. The sense of acceptance and community was there. Add in a sprinkling of getting really in touch with our bodies and minds through the practice of yoga and meditation, and the sense of ease and peace became pretty palpable.

Practicing before day 2 of the retreat at Wakulla Springs

I definitely learned some logistical lessons that I can take with me into the future (like maybe not planning a retreat in Florida during hurricane season!), but I can confidently say it was a success.

Yoga is about connection, and it’s not just about connecting to ourselves. It’s also about connecting deeply to others. Acknowledging that essentially, we’re all the same. I can’t wait to create more opportunities like this, for us to take time away from our chronic busy-ness to enjoy the simple and powerful pleasure of spending time with other people, doing things that make us feel good.

My First Kundalini Class (What's Your Yoga Match Part 3)

Continuing my exploration of different yoga styles, I came across one that I’d never really tried before. If you’re paying attention to yoga in popular culture, it’s easy to see the lean towards a fitness mentality. Yoga clothes that focus on “improving performance” with “sweat-wicking” technology have become the norm, and it’s not unusual for people to start yoga because they want to improve their physical fitness.

That’s not what all yoga is like, though. Today I want to tell you about my first experience exploring a Kundalini Yoga class.

I found Kundalini yoga first through author and speaker Gabby Bernstein. As a Kundalini yoga teacher herself, she offers several meditations and practices in some of her books and online videos. I’d had great experiences with some of those meditations but sometimes felt silly holding my arms up over my head and chanting alone in a room. During one particularly powerful chanting session at home, in fact, both my dogs ran in to stare at me and started barking as loud as they could. Let's just say it wasn’t quite the experience I’d imagined.

Photo by Antonika Chanel on Unsplash

I was intrigued by this style of yoga that focused on moving energy and healing ourselves using more than just asana or postures, so I decided to try a class in person.

Going into my first class I really wasn’t sure what to expect. It was my first time at Namaste Yoga in Tallahassee, and I’m always reminded, my first time at a new yoga studio, how confusing these spaces can be to those who haven’t visited before. Which door do I go in? Where do I leave my shoes? How do I pay?

When I walked into the room where the class was happening I saw all sorts of different people wearing all sorts of different things. The teacher, Jasbir, and two students were wearing all white, one woman wore flared jeans, and I and two other students had regular athletic clothing on. A pretty motley crew! I did some reading after the fact and found out that the white clothing and white turbans are worn in Kundalini yoga are meant to strengthen and expand our auras. You don’t have to wear white to class though.

Throughout the class, we did a variety of postures, repetitive movements, seated holds, and chanting out loud and in our heads. Each part lasted for about three minutes. Some of them, to be honest, I had a hard time keeping a straight face for. I kept thinking during the Har meditation that if someone were to walk into the room, they would be very confused. Some of them were just hard, in that they involved some physical movements that started out easy but became harder over the three minutes we continued.

Overall, I really enjoyed it and plan to go back. It was nice to be in a class where we were all willing to try things that seemed a little silly in the hope that they would help us tune in better to our own inner selves and the universal forces that impact us.

You might love Kundalini Yoga if: you enjoy the more spiritual and metaphysical aspects of yoga, you enjoy chanting and mantra meditation

You might not love Kundalini Yoga if: chanting, especially in ancient languages, makes you uncomfortable, you’re looking for a more fitness-based yoga class

Final thought: The teacher mentioned twice that Kundalini yoga can help you start to see deeper truths and patterns in your life that you can work on moving forward. “If you think your life is perfect,” she said, “don’t do Kundalini yoga.”

What's Your Yoga Match? (Part 2)

It's the start of a new year, and lots of people are trying yoga on for size as part of their new year's resolutions! It can be a little stressful, though, trying to figure out which yoga class is for you. Over the centuries since yoga emerged in India and made its way slowly to the U.S. lots of different styles and traditions have sprung up. There are also different "branded" yoga styles that have been developed fairly recently and consist of a unique style of teaching or sequencing the poses. So as a brand-new-to-yoga student, how do you figure out which style is the best fit for you?

Well, you could try a lot of trial and error. The best way to figure out which of the styles you like best is to actually try them in your body and reflect on how it makes you feel!

But, in case you want a little help guiding that process, I've included my tips on what some of the different styles are all about.

Also, just as a warning, a lot of these terms are used pretty broadly by many yoga guides and studios. You will want to check with your studio or teacher for confirmation before heading to your first class.

Due to length, I’m posting this one in several parts. You can see last week’s post here. and check back next week for three more styles! In the meantime, maybe try one of the ones I’ve described here, and comment with your thoughts!

Hot yoga is taught in rooms heated up to 105 degrees Fahrenheit. Just think of it as your own tropical yoga retreat. Photo by Jared Rice on Unsplash

Hot Yoga

Hot Yoga as a genre is relatively new, and also very old. If you think about it, in many parts of India, most yoga would have been hot yoga as air conditioning was not a part of our human experience until only a few decades ago. Now, Hot Yoga is practiced in specially heated rooms either with a traditional heater, space heater, or fancy infrared lights! Depending on the studio, the heat can range from 95-105 degrees Fahrenheit. At both studios I've taught at, we change the heat based on humidity to make sure that everyone can still breathe and move through the whole class without getting too overheated. Humidity makes a huge difference in the hot yoga experience: 100 degrees in Florida is a lot different than 100 degrees in Colorado.

In traditional hot yoga classes, students are guided through the same sequence of poses in each class, starting with standing postures and eventually moving down to the floor. Each pose is done twice, once for 30 seconds, and once for a full minute. There's a clear break in between each pose, and some teachers might even count down to the end of the hold for you.

Because of the heat and the vigorous nature of the poses, Hot Yoga can be pretty intense! The Mayo Clinic recommends avoiding hot yoga if you have heart disease, heat intolerance, dehydration problems, or other heat-related ailments. Also, many teachers recommend not practicing Hot Yoga while pregnant.

You might love Hot Yoga if: you feel like you're not working out unless you are sweating buckets, you like the idea of having basically the same class each time (it makes it easy to track your progress)

You might not love Hot Yoga if: having someone count down your holds makes them feel even longer, you hate being super sweaty, you're looking for a really calm relaxing environment for your yoga practice

Make sure you bring: the biggest water bottle you have, a towel (and not a hand towel either. You know the one you bring to the beach? Bring that one. Maybe bring two.)

Vinyasa yoga embraces the idea of sequencing poses to you can “flow” from one to the next. Photo by Akemy Mory on Unsplash

Vinyasa (aka Flow) Yoga

Vinyasa can mean two things in yoga land, but it generally means "Flow". A Vinyasa yoga class is normally pretty creative in that the guide might design their own sequence of poses and change them up each class. Instead of clear stops in between each pose, students will practice moving easily from one posture to the next. Sometimes you will flow through "a vinyasa". In this context, a vinyasa is a sequence of poses (plank, chaturanga, upward dog, downward dog) done in between two other poses. Most yoga guides will let you know that the vinyasas are optional though, and you'll notice other students (myself included) skipping them from time to time.

Because each guide makes up their own flow for each class, theres a lot of variation in Vinyasa yoga. They can be vigorous and challenging, or relaxing and slow, or somewhere in between. Some studios will help you out by marking their class with levels (i.e. " Intro Flow, Flow 1, Flow 2 " ) but others will not. It's a good idea to ask about the teacher in that case, as different teachers might lean towards different pacing and intensity levels.

You might love Vinyasa Flow if: you want every class to be different - repetition is boring, you love linking poses together without a clear start or finish, you crave more movement and less stillness, you're not afraid of some interesting pose transitions.

You might not love Vinyasa Flow if: you want lots of time to get into and out of each pose to make sure you're doing it right, you like the comfort of having the same class sequence each time you practice, chaturanga makes you anxious and irritable, you

Hot Vinyasa (Hot Flow) Yoga

So if you've read this far you might be able to guess that Hot Vinyasa is sort of a combination of the two styles above. This is the class I teach most frequently. It's a Flow class taught in a heated room. Once again there can be a lot of variation in the pacing and the difficulty level of these classes. It's a good idea to check with the studio or the teacher directly if you have any questions.

You might love Hot Flow if: You want a lot of movement and a lot of sweat! You love the idea of practicing in a hot room, but are not a fan of the traditional Hot Yoga sequencing.

You might not love Hot Flow if: You have no desire to ever practice in a heated room, or you're truly committed to the set sequence of your traditional hot or ashtanga class.

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So that’s it for part 2 of my yoga styles breakdown. Which ones have you tried? Do you think my descriptions are right on target, or waaaay off? What styles do you still want to hear about? Let me know in comments!

What's Your Yoga Match? (Part 1)

It's the start of a new year, and lots of people are trying yoga on for size as part of their new year's resolutions! It can be a little stressful, though, trying to figure out which yoga class is for you. Over the centuries since yoga emerged in India and made its way slowly to the U.S. lots of different styles and traditions have sprung up. There are also different "branded" yoga styles that have been developed fairly recently and consist of a unique style of teaching or sequencing the poses. So as a brand-new-to-yoga student, how do you figure out which style is the best fit for you?

Well, you could try a lot of trial and error. The best way to figure out which of the styles you like best is to actually try them in your body and reflect on how it makes you feel!

But, in case you want a little help guiding that process, I've included my tips on what some of the different styles are all about.

Due to length, I’m posting this one in several parts. Check back next week for three more styles! In the meantime, maybe try one of the ones I’ve described here, and comment with your thoughts!

Hatha yoga is often beginner-friendly, and moves at a calm pace. Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash

1. Hatha Yoga

Hatha Yoga is a really broad, general term encompassing all the yoga you do with your body. Technically, all the styles on this list are Hatha Yoga. It's meant as a contrast to different yoga practices that don't involve poses or movement of the body, and instead focus on meditation, breath work, and devotional practice.

However, when you see "Hatha Yoga" listed on a studio schedule, you can normally expect a fairly slow class that is focused on body position and alignment. It's not uncommon in these classes to hold poses for a while. You'll do standing and seated postures, and will also be taught to focus on your breath as you hold each pose.

You might love Hatha Yoga if: you like detailed instruction on how your body should look in each pose, you want lots of time to get in and out of each pose, you want a slower pace in general.

You might not love Hatha Yoga if: you get bored or tired holding one shape for too long, you crave a faster pace and physical exertion, you love to do yoga with fun and energetic music (Hatha classes normally have relaxing spa-like tunes, if any)

2. Ashtanga Yoga

Ashtanga is one of those ancient practices handed down the line for generations. In it's most rigorous incarnation, it's meant to be practiced every day in the early morning at your own pace with only your breath or a teacher to guide and offer suggestions. Classes like this are called "Mysore" classes, named for the place in India where the practice originated. It is not a reference to how sore you will be after the class. The alternative to Mysore Ashtanga is a "led" Ashtanga class. In these classes the instructor guides the whole class through the same sequence at once. Less personalized, but more in line with what you might expect from a western yoga class.

In either case, you will do the same sequence of poses in the same order each time. Although most of the poses are appropriate for beginners, some of them get a little pretzel-y towards the end. At the start of class you will do 10 sun salutations (think burpees but for yoga) to warm up, and in between many postures you'll do a mini-sun salutation called a "vinyasa". This makes the class pretty physically exhausting, since you can do the equivalent of up to 76 push-ups in each class.

You might love Ashtanga Yoga if: You have a lot of energy and enjoy moving a lot in your yoga practice, you thrive on structure, you like to see your progress clearly over time (since the sequence is always the same it's easy to see your gains), you want a physical challenge, you're into the tradition and history of yoga.

You might not love Ashtanga Yoga if: You get bored doing the same thing every time you workout, you crave an easy-going pace, you experience a lot of self-judgement if you can't nail a pose the first time, you have no desire to build your upper body strength, thank you very much.

Ashtanga follows a set sequence of postures, and can be done in a group or in a more personalized mysore-style practice. Photo by Artem Bali on Unsplash

3. Yin Yoga

Yin is the opposite of Yang. Where yang yoga styles are characterized by lots of movement and strenuous activity, yin is slow, quiet, and very supportive. It's meant to work the ligaments and connective tissues in your body that can't actually stretch. So, instead of quickly moving from pose to pose, in yin yoga you can hold a pose for anywhere from 2-10 minutes. It's encouraged to support your body with lots of props so as not to over-stress the joints and ligaments, but it's not a "restorative" class. Although, it can be very relaxing.

In yin classes the room is normally cool, so you may want to wear warm fuzzy socks and a cozy sweater. Many classes will also provide blankets and lovely pillows called "bolsters". The goal is to get your body into the "goldie-locks" version of the pose, where it's not too easy but not too hard, and support it there with your props, so you can focus on breathing and releasing tension and maybe slowly getting deeper into the shape over time. Almost all of the poses in yin yoga are seated or reclined.

You might love Yin Yoga if: You enjoy being swaddled in warm cozy clothes and blankets, you stress about getting into and out of poses quickly, you love the idea of chilling in a dim, cool space for an hour or so at the end of the day to relax, you want to make long-term sustainable gains in flexibility and joint mobility.

You might not love Yin Yoga if: You need movement or music to keep your mind from wandering, you have a lot of excess energy to burn off, quiet makes you uncomfortable.

I recommend Yin Yoga for: cross-training for any intense physical exercise like running, tennis, martial arts. Actually, Yin Yoga was developed by a martial artist to help with developing flexibility and range of motion!

I’ll be back next week with a few more styles! In the meantime, I’d love to hear about your experiences with yoga of any kind! You can comment here, or message me on instagram @megangillman.

Yoga is a Conversation

Practicing yoga, I think, is like practicing conversational skills. I used to be crap at having conversations. I would be constantly thinking about the next funny, witty, impressive thing I could say. I would barely even listen to the other person. If it was a serious conversation I would think of my next argument, how I would structure it to prove that my point of view was the right one. I wasn't trying to have a conversation. I was trying to impose my will on the world by getting people to see and do things my way, one person at a time. 

What this looks like in yoga is stress and struggle as we try to put our "mind over matter" and make our bodies do things that it doesn't necessarily want. The philosophy of push through the pain and no pain no gain are manifestations of this perspective. Instead of having a conversation with our bodies, we tell them what to do and use a whole host of strategies to get them to obey. 

Photo by Christopher Campbell on Unsplash

A real conversation requires listening as much as you speak and being open to seeing and doing things differently. When yoga is a conversation with your body it becomes innately healing for both your body and your mind. When you allow your body to share what it needs, how it feels, and how it wants to move, you open up to possibilities you may not have anticipated. Likewise, sometimes your body will listen to your mind's suggestions, and through the collaboration end up somewhere wonderful, and sometimes your body might give you suggestions that help your mind. 

Like a good conversation, the mind-body partnership in yoga should provide mutual benefits and actively involve both parties. It's a mutually beneficial relationship, and when both body and mind are present in the conversation there's no chance for injury or stress to be built up because there is no pushing or forcing. 

The wonderful thing is that when you practice this in yoga, you can bring it with you into other conversations with friends and family. The way you practice one thing is the way you do everything, and so by being open and listening to your body, you may notice more ease and more openness in other areas of your life. For me, it's translated into better relationships with friends and family, and also into other fitness pursuits. It's helped tremendously with my running, as it's easier for me to tune in to what my body is telling me, when I need to slow down, when I need to stop and stretch, and when I can push harder. 

What other parts of our lives could be improved if we were committed to listening as much as we talk? Receiving as much as we give? On and off the mat, letting go of this push mentality can open up space to accomplish so much more!