What if instead of killing ourselves trying to figure out if we were showing up as the person we WANTED them to be (in order to, what, trick them into hiring us?) we practiced showing up over and over again in interviews as exactly who we ARE.
So many women struggle with imposter syndrome, and could part of the reason be that we're taught that in cover letters and interviews we are supposed to present ourselves in a "certain" way? And then once we start the job we're faced with the reality that they hired a performance we put on, instead of who we actually are?
I always like to think of job searching as, basically, online dating (it totally is! Stick with me here).
In online dating, you look at a profile that shows you a little tiny bit about another human. You "swipe right" or let them know you're interested and now they can see a profile that shows you a tiny little bit about you.
If it looks to both of you like you'd be a good fit, you schedule a first date.
Then, if you really like the first date, you might start "dating" right away or you might "talk" a few more times before you decide to enter a commitment.
Most of us empowered women are on the same page now about dating. If you put fake shit in your profile and then act fake on your first date, the best-case scenario is you end up in a relationship that's totally wrong for you.
SO WHY DO WE STILL PUT ON A CHARACTER FOR JOB SEARCHING?
Because we've been taught that we need to show up "professionally" and that hiring managers are looking for certain "qualities".
Well, ladies, it wasn't so long ago that we were told the same thing about men (assuming you'd prefer a romantic partnership with a man, that is_.
We've lived. We've learned. We've evolved.
It's time to take that newfound knowledge out of the bedroom and into the interview room.
Here are a few ways you can show up more authentically in your job search, so you know when you get hired that they want YOU. Exactly how you are.
It starts with the cover letter. A) Write one. If you're not doing this you're missing a key opportunity to let them see who you actually are, because a resume only can do so much. B) Write it in your own voice. The one you would use if you were talking to a beloved mentor, or a boss who totally got you.
The mantra here is not "I want them to like me". The mantra is "I want them to be totally clear on whether or not they want to talk to me."
Stay calm in the interview. I know, easier said than done. Interviews are scary and stressful. Use EVERY tool in your tool box to help you stay calm and relaxed. Meditate. Do some yoga. Listen to your affirmations. Call your hype girl. Whatever it takes to help you get closer and closer to calm. It may take some practice, but it gets easier.
Let YOU shine through. When you're feeling calm your actual personality can show and shine in the interview, instead of the character you put on that acts exactly how you think they want you to act. Remember, it's just a first date. If you act like someone you're not, then they can't decide if they actually like you for YOU.
Look for what YOU want. Just like on a first date, you're interviewing them too. When you're feeling calm and grounded it becomes a million times easier to tune in to your intuition and notice red flags when they pop up. Remember to trust them when they show you who they are. If they make you jump through stupid hoops in the interview process, chances are they won't stop once you're hired.
I feel like I could go on and on and on here, so maybe I should turn this into a podcast episode or something. I hope you see where this is going, though. The key to creating a work life, and a work-life-balance that you feel great about is ditching the performance of how you think you "should" be showing up and being honest from the get-go about who you really are.
I know it can feel scary, even sometimes impossible, and that's why I make it my whole business to support women through the process of doing this work and making these changes. You can set up a free strategy session with me today to find out more about how I can help you fast-track your way to the life you've been dreaming of.