Pregnancy can be a time full of joyful expectation.
It can also be freaking terrifying.
As a first-time expectant mom in the middle of a global pandemic in a country that does relatively little to support and care for women, moms, and families, worry and anxiety were some of the most prominent feelings during my pregnancy.
Here are the mantras and affirmations that helped me come back to my peace and my power during my prenatal journey.
“Pregnancy is not an independent research project”
This is a quote from the book Bringing Up Bébé by Pamela Druckerman, and it became my first lifeline during pregnancy. When I found out that I was expecting, the only thing I really knew was that I did not know anything about what was going to happen with me, my body, or my baby. Bookstores are full of information on “what to expect” and how to do this pregnancy thing correctly. The internet is even more full. But when I read this line something deep inside me heaved a sigh of relief. It is not my job to research and distill the perfect way to be pregnant, give birth, and raise a child. In fact, generations of women have given birth and raised children without having access to the expert advice we are surrounded by today. This mantra was one I repeated every time I felt the urge to look outside myself to ask books or the internet if I was doing this “right”.
“My baby is the perfect size for my body”
This affirmation came from my HypnoBirthing resources and it was more helpful than I originally realized. I am a big person. My husband is a big person. And we were both very big babies. The idea of a 9 or 10 pound human emerging from one of the most sensitive parts of my body often felt impossible, and it was a source of a lot of fear and worry for me. I was anticipating a lot of pain, tearing, or worse, complications from having a baby so big that I couldn’t deliver them!
When I first heard this affirmation play on my tapes I thought “ok, easy to say, but what if it’s NOT?”. But the more often I listened to and repeated this affirmation, the more it began to make sense. My body was literally making this child. I made the blueprints (or at least half of them) and then I engaged in the miraculous, biological 3D printing of this child. It was literally made from my body. So of course it would be the perfect size for me. I kept repeating this over and over, especially during labor, and when my baby arrived earthside, he was big, sure. But he was perfect.
“Whatever comes, I can handle it.”
Every day of my pregnancy, it seemed, new terrifying worries would pop up. I’d be driving through an intersection and think “what if a car hits me right now and it hurts me and the baby?”. What if the baby is sick right now and I don’t know it? What if my birth plan falls apart and I have to be rushed to the hospital? What if my baby doesn’t get to see his family until he’s almost 5 because of all this Covid crap?
These “what-ifs” plagued me every day. It’s crazy that we spend our lives pouring over these hypothetical scenarios as if we can control it. As if we can somehow predict and avoid all pain and danger. We can’t. If 2020 has taught us anything it’s that much of what we thought we could control is actually far outside of our control. And yet, we can handle it.
So this is the affirmation I came back to in order to head-off my worry. When I find myself stressing about things that may or may not happen, I come back to this one truth. Whatever comes, I’ll handle it and move forward from there.
I hope these mantras help you if you’re an expectant mom too! If you find that you’re feeling so much anxiety and worry that you can’t snap out of it, talk to your healthcare provider and get help (that’s what I did!)
If you’re thinking that all this sounds well and good, but can repeating affirmations and mantras really make a difference? I hear you, skeptic sister! Email me today to learn more about how thought work like this can help you get to a new level of living. It’s one of the main tools I use on myself and with my coaching clients to create beautiful change!